They say there is no perfect marriage. They also say even the happiest couples can end up with a failed marriage. Many couples drift away from each other because they fail to recognize their own bad behaviors sufficiently to change them. It is easy to rely on your spouse and his or her ability to understand and love you, just the way you are. It is easy to think that you don’t need to change, that the best relationship is that which is built on tolerance. But when your relationship begins to fall apart, the way to avoid divorce is to do some introspection and decide to change yourself once and for all.
To help you recognize the types of behavior that could hurt your marriage, here are some of them:
Article Table of Contents
Bad Behavior No. 1: Abusiveness
Even the most dependent spouse or lover can have enough of the abuse. When your partner tells you that he or she is feeling abused in the relationship, never discount the fact that he or should be right and that you could be abusive indeed. The worst abusers are those that do not realize that they are doing something wrong. You need to be upfront with yourself before you can change this behavior.
Bad Behavior No. 2: Defensiveness
Sometimes, it only takes learning how to listen to get your marriage back on the right track. Many arguments stem from the inability of one or both partners to stay quiet, listen to the other, and take whatever the other says seriously. If you feel that everything he or she says about you is a personal attack, then there is no way that you can get past the argument. Let the other talk while you listen without your defenses. This is the first step to meeting halfway.
Bad Behavior No. 3: Insensitivity
This is the common complaint of wives and girlfriends. Nobody has really pinned down what being sensitive means or entails, but you might need to delve into this if you want to stay married. Sensitivity requires knowing what is important to the other, and taking steps to make the other feel that you recognize how she feels about these priorities, at a time when she needs you to know and she needs you to make her feel so